The Biography, Part 2

Here's the second look into our braintrust, this time, it's me!

1. What kind of pasta are you?
Tri-colored rotini all the way.

2. What's your stance on parking: Backing in or front-first?
Under normal circumstances, backing in. You would need at least ten car lengths to pull in front-first.

3. If you had three months' severance pay, how would you spend your time?
I'm not sure I would drape myself in velvet and eat blocks of cheese, but I would definitely take it easy. I would only wake up to my internal alarm clock, spend a lot of time reading and playing video games. I suppose I could find a good internship somewhere and try to get some real world corporate experience.

4. If someone offered you a bite of their dessert, would you take it and why?
As long as it was something I liked, most definitely. I like simple desserts, nothing fancy. I'm not a fan of creme filled stuff.

5. Which of the four main characters best fits your personality?
I'd like to think I'm fairly "normal" like Jerry, but I know I have many quirks, so I'd be a cross between Kramer & George. After all, I am afraid of clowns.

6. If you had one to spare, would you spare a square?
Only if I had one to spare.

7. How long would you wait in the restaurant lobby for a good meal?
It would obviously depend on what restaurant. If it was your average run-of-the-mill place, twenty minutes. If it was my favorite, I could kill 45 minutes to an hour.

8. Could you win The Contest?
Prognosis Negative...

9. What's the combination to your vault?
I don't drink, so it most certainly wouldn't be peach schnapps. It would be a toss-up between Vanilla Coke and a Slush Puppie.

10. Would you bring a date to an open surgery?
Yeah, I'm going to have to say no to this, unless it was mine. If I'm awake, I'd be a little squeamish as soon as the first incision was made.

11. Which one of Jerry's many girlfriends is your favorite?
I can't just pick one! In no particular order, Deborah Messing, the anti-dentite, Sophie, the one with the tractor story, Claire, the one who didn't like The Voice, Tia Van Camp, the one who caught Jerry picking and finally, Christine Taylor, the one who everyone thought was a loser, but really wasn't.

12. If you were going to change your name, what would it be?
Al Knockerup, an ode to another funny man, Red.

13. Seven or Soda?
Soda. If George's favorite player was Ron Darling, Twelve would be a much better choice, but in this instance, Soda gets the nod.

14. Would you give the Pig Man a ride home?
Sure. I mean, he's half pig, half man, who wouldn't want to share a ride with the Pig Man? Plus, I wouldn't want him to take the bus.

15. If it's hovering about the cylinder, is it garbage?
Oh yeah, it's garbage. If it's even close to the rim, it's garbage.

16. Who's your favorite explorer?
Adriean Block, who found my favorite place on earth, Fishers Island.

17. Brett had "Desparado". What's your song?
I'd have to go with "Everlong" by the Foo Fighters, although "Pac Man Fever" would be a close second.

18. Is soup a meal?
Absolutely not. On this issue, there is no debate!

19. Would you rather date the blind or the deaf?
The deaf. I've always wanted to learn sign language. Also, I could still be a slob & leave stuff all over the place and not have to worry about her tripping over it.

20. Which of all the salted cured meats do you find to be the most sensual?
Pepperoni all the way!